Chess Addiction Test!

OK, I have to admit it. I am a bit of a chess addict. I am playing since I was five, I have plenty of books and magazines. I am following GM's games online, I am playing chess online, I have a blog about chess...I even brought chess into the kitchen with my own cooking chess recipes. My wedding cake was with chess motifs, in University I was always talking about chess (it was interesting from psychological point of view as well - I graduated Psychology). I dream about chess and becoming better...what else? I wanted to give up at some point, but...chess didn't want to let me down:) So I went to the next tournament, than another one and than the next and so on...

What about you? Do you see people as pawns? Yourself as a king? Well...the mere fact that you are here at alinalami.blogspot.com, reading this article, is not exactly in your favour:)

For your own good, for the sake of your loved ones, take a few minutes to determine if you are a chess-o-holic.

Answer Yes or No to the following questions:

1. As soon as you are out of bed, you turn on your computer and check the online games.

2. You buy the biggest, fastest, most expensive computer just to let your engine run faster.

3. You have more chess clocks than watches.

4. You buy a newspaper only if it has a chess column in it.

5. You take a chess book to the bathroom and forget to go to the bathroom.

6. Every week you download every chess game from every chess site on the Internet.

7. You have more chess books than any other books or magazines combined.

8. You spot the chessboard set up wrong in every movie or tv program with a chess scene.

9. You have a chess logo on you tshirt.

10. You have a chess mug for coffee.

11. You have more PGN than DOC files on your computer.

12. Preparing for a good chess game online requires cleaning the mouse and checking it's working order.

 Choose the response which fits you best:

13. Gentlemen, you find yourself seated next to a beautiful woman, in a tournament's closing ceremony. You:

A. Remark her eyes and get distracted from the ceremony.

B. Try to find a better sit, closer to the chess stars.

C. Take out your pocket-sized Russian dictionary.

14. Ladies, you find yourself seated next to this man, in the same closing ceremony. You:

A. Accidentally look at him and make a nice remark about whatever.

B. Try to find a sit next to the strongest GM.

C. Stand up and run for your life.

15. Chess is:

A. A fairy tale of 1001 blunders. (Tartakover)

B. As much mistery as women. (Purdy)

C. Everything: art, science, sport. (Karpov)

D. Above all, a fight. (Lasker)

E. _________________ (Fill in the blank)

Scoring:

    * The mere fact that you took this test counts against you: negative 10 points.

    * For every "Yes" answer you gave, that's negative another 10.

    * For every answer "B" you gave, you know what to do. (By the way, if you answered both questions 13 and 14, you have problems well beyond the scope of this article)

    * If you chose "E" for number 15 and said "Life" (like Fischer once), please cut again 10 points.

Rating:

- 40 to -60: Incipient Chess Addict. Seek professional help now! It's not too late for you to get into a more healthy, fulfilling lifestyle, such as crocodile wrestling, car racing or being a fireman!

-70 to - 90: Confirmed Chess Abuser. Well...you're a mess. With bloodshot eyes, you meet someone and your first question is: "What's your rating?" - if you are trying to get a date, think it all over.

-100 and up: I'm sorry, but you are a hopeless case...clear sign for being a chess-o-holic: you have read all of this!

- inspiration sources: www.chess.com, www.chessdom.com, www.chessville.com